Crossfit Fast Factory - St. Cloud, MN

The Simple Guide to Growing Some @#$%ing Balls

You may have them. You may not. You may have had them (at one point). You may have given them away. Hey, you may even have had them surgically removed. That’s cool. I’m down with that. Gentle sir/madam, I am here today to present to you an eternal truth. It is unquestionable and unalienable, unassailable, unbendable, and above all, unkickable. If you have balls, my friend… you’re going to have a good life. Balls are everything. They affect every part of your life from birth onward. If you got a pair early during a dice game, lucky you. But that isn’t most of us. Most of us get our balls later in life, if at all, and when we get them, it’s after scrapes, bruises and lots of scars. How do I know this? Well, I’ll tell you. For a very long time, I did not have balls. Like most people, I wasn’t born with them. I was a big fucking wuss, actually, and I got emotionally beat down again and again by the world. This happened for many years.